Okay, so…. Milan!! I really had no expectations of Milan being super awesome. I knew there would be good shopping and all but beyond that…. There wasn´t supposed to be a whole lot but DANG was this a fun, fun, fun day! We spent most of the morning shopping. We wandered in and out of stores and it was awesome! Sadie needed to find a jacket and I refused to leave without some new sexy Milan shoes. So, we were going to make it happen! We went inside Louis Vuitton and Prada and felt poorer just by being in there. Seriously, I swear they only hire really ridiculously good looking people. It was fabulous.
After a couple hours of shopping with no success, we started to get irritable and hungry. We decided to give shopping a break, check out the Duomo (awesome giant church thing) and then get something to eat before getting back to the stores. Well, what we didn´t know was that this was the final day of Carnival in Milan and so we were there for all of the celebrations! We went through the church that had the most ridiculous stained glass windows I have ever seen and then moved onto climb up a million spiraling stairs to see the view from the top of the church. AMAZING!!!!!! Of course we took tons of pictures while we were up there cuz the world is our photo shoot. The view was incredible AND while we were up there, the parade started!!! We got to see flag throwers! Apparently it is an Italian thing but it was super cool. I will post the video on Facebook. We also saw all the bands and the floats from up above without other people´s heads in our way. Genius! And this was no ten minute Edmonton parade. This thing actually went on forever. Probably well over half an hour or forty five minutes. I wouldn´t be shocked if it was stretching towards an hour. About halfway through Sadie and I were starting to die of hunger so we decided to ditch out and search for some food.
Well, easier said than done. The problem was that the parade had blocked us inside the central plaza and we couldn´t get out cuz there were crowd controlling blockades and a giant parade in the way. We sat there starving and waiting for it to end and when it did we actually RAN through the crowd, throwing elbows in search of food. We found a Burger King and that sounded absolutely perfect and fast. Yum! We ate and then the most ridiculous thing happened.
I was up in the bathroom afterwards and as I was leaving there was this single dad pushing this little girl all dressed up like a princess towards the bathroom as she leaned back on him refusing to go in. I felt bad for the guy so I reached out my hand to invite the little girl in so she would know it isn´t scary and that she will be alright. It was awesome. The ahhhh-an-adult-stranger-is-making-me-do-something-and-I-am-totally-freaked-but-can´t-say-no look set in and she took my hand and followed me in. My thought was get the girl in and she will be fine, but nope.... that was not the case. She then expected me to help her with her costume. So, here I am in a bathroom stall in Italy with a little Italian girl that doesn´t speak Spanish OR English and I am stripping her down and helping her pee. It was HILARIOUS! I was trying to talk to her and help her feel calm but I am quite certain I just freaked her out even more. Seriously, awesome. What parent just gives over his kid like that anyways?!? Haha!! After she was done she basically ran out of the place without even washing her hands. Yup, I am that scary. Sadie and I had a good laugh over it and then set off to do some more shopping.
In Milan there is this mall that has four crests on the floor of the main cities in Italy. One of them has an Ox on the crest and apparently it is good luck to spin around on your heels on this bull´s balls. Yup.... The perfect conclusion of the weekend. We had groped Juliet and now we were off to stomp on some male genitals. When we first got in the mall there was a big crowd standing on top off it so we had a hard time finding it, but don´t worry, we found it and completed our Boobs and Balls weekend. So inappropriate but I am going to have so much good luck this year, you are going to be so jealous!! It is hilarious. There is actually a hole in the floor from people spinning on it so much.
After this we went out into the main square. This place was in chaos by now! There was confetti EVERYWHERE!!!!! And people had this foamy soap that they would spray at each other and there was silly string and streamers and everything. It was crazy and so much fun. We bought ourselves a wonderful bag of confetti and joined in! We were covered by the end of it. Random people would walk up and spray us with foam and throw confetti. Oh we just laughed and laughed and had a hoot. We even found a grate on this street for the metro and the air coming up from below was blowing confetti way up into the air. It was the coolest thing and we danced in it with all the little kids in costumes. We are mature like that.
After enjoying the festivities of Carnival we headed off to complete our shopping adventures. I am glad to report that we both completed our goals. We cut it close in the end but we made it happen. I now own some pretty freaking awesome and beautiful shoes. They are all lacy and gorgeous. Yup, basically I am irresistible when I wear them. Now I can cross that off of my list of things to do as well! Go me!
The only other interesting thing to talk about with this trip was the hostel we stayed in when we got to Bergamo, where we flew out of. This was hands down the WORST hostel I have stayed in but it is totally a laugh now! So, we got into Bergamo and went straight to the hostel because ´´Reception´´ closes at midnight. We got there and found this apartment building and buzzed up. This super old guy came down to meet us. Mercedes looks at him and says Caio!! And he immediately shushes her. YAH… SHUSHES HER!!!!! I wanted to burst out laughing. Okay.... strange, but okay. Good times, good times. So, after this all happens we head up to the hostel, and it is literally someone´s house and they have a room for people to stay in. It is all cluttered and lived in and nothing like a hostel or a hotel or even a B&B. We come in and the fun just never ended! There were rules about when we could shower and when we were allowed to flush the toilet and when we couldn´t. When he was copying our passport info he was actually using a magnifying glass to see the letters!! And there is a free ´´shuttle´´ to the airport in the morning which is basically him dropping us off in his station wagon. So, we told him when our flight was and he was like, okay, we will leave at 7 so that means you don´t get food cuz breakfast doesn´t start until 7. And that means you will need to get up at 6:30. And we just looked at him shocked that he was telling us when to wake up so he repeated it again and I said, yes, we will wake up when we think it is time to wake up, thank you. And then he went on to write it on a piece of paper!!!! 6:30, that is when you will wake up. Now, for those of you who know me, I don´t really do so well with people limiting my freedoms and my independence so now I am trying really hard not to be a brat and just let it go. At the end of our wonderful little meeting of a check in, he looks at us and says, okay, you go to bed now. Good night. Seriously. LOVED IT!! Hahahaahaha! We went into the room and there were ants everywhere and the internet gets cut off at midnight. Seriously, things just got better and better. The next morning he actually came in to make sure we were up and tell us he was pulling the car around which I mean, was nice I guess. We grabbed some food, cuz I paid for a B&B so I was getting me some food, and then headed out. He didn´t help us with the bags at all and so we struggled in the pouring rain and in the end he didn´t even drop us off right at the airport, we had to walk through the rain to get to the doors. Not far really, but by this time, it was such a gong show and it was just the icing on the cake of a bad hostel. Haha! Seriously, in the moment so frustrating but all we could do is just laugh and laugh and laugh about how ridiculously awesome it was. Good times, good times.
But hey, we got to the airport, got on the plane and then Sadie and I headed off to Madrid. We got there just in time for us to rush to church so I could speak in sacrament meeting and then teach my Sunday School lesson. Ohhhhh how I am loving all of this!!!
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